my husband left me because he was unhappy my husband left me because he was unhappy

It sounds life a lot of work, but its not. I dont care if you were tired of being the blunt, you took vows that said through sickness and in health. Anytime l confronted him about anything l was TRIPPING. Just because it seems like they dont love you doesnt mean that theyre done with you. Most likely you fell out of love because you decided to stop loving your partner or you decided that you loved someone or something else even more. Im SO GLAD I am off that (not so) Merry go round come roller coaster rides through dark depressive rides in and out of sadness. We are taking it slow and I hope to move there within a year There is a large age gap, which wasnt a problem at first, but now he works all the time and only cares about money. Its just going to crush me down the rd seeing her with another man. This podcast explores all things love and relationships. "I am in a no win situation.". About 8 years in we had a son forcing us to live with her parents on a temp basis (a year!!) The intimate time with her husband was seldom and she wanted more out of life. Have you thought about maybe having the teacher of your oldest daughter call DYFS? I dont understand whats happened in these last 2 weeks. Medical lot are checking daily but there is nothing I can do. I am reeling. Coping with the end of a relationship can be difficult on many levels. She left you without warning after 10 years of marriage because her family and a so called friend pushed her to do so. She didnt admit the affair part until this week. When I first found out he said he would never leave me but now she has said she cant live undercover. What is very sad today is that the great majority of women cause most divorces, and theyre without a doubt such low life losers altogether too. Hatred is not something u do to someone u love, even I know this. This has always worked well for us. And, while cleaning up our home computer, I found a file of pics. I was with her for 95% of every treatment. Six months where I have stayed silent on this topic because of the guilt and . I feel bad for those who do, because I dont even understand it. Stay Focused, Pray, Keep Faith and Believe . I do not believe that you can just fall out of love one day as if it is completely unrelated to how each of the partners interacts with one another. Head up love yourself because if you dont how do you expect others to love you and dont beg or say you will do anything or offer to change it will not work . Im not saying to use self-help books as a magic pill that will solve all your problems. He is 17 months. It's called anhedonia, the inability to feel pleasure or interest in anything. Really just venting now and it does help. I understand its a problem, but I can not figure out a way to stop it If you want a divorce its fine. we were happyhappy for 2 years. You might have understandable reasons to be mentally composing your packing list. The councilor suggested that I pay a visit to my gynecologist to get things checked out. Definitely start working out. I cannot forgive her even if I want to (and I know I should) what can I do in order to surpass this? 6. Its rough but in the long run we will be better off. We have two children together and she has two other children by two other fathers that are not in their lives. Keep me posted on how things are going for you. All he has said, via text, is that im an awful person who talks down to him which is not true. A month ago my partner of 4 years woke up got ready for work, was just about to leave when I asked him about meeting to go book our summer holidays he turned to me and said I dont think we should as I dont live you anymore Im leaving you. I liked the above article and I think some of all the factors entered into his leaving. Oh well, f$%# her! I would always find pills in her pockets , on the floor, in her car , in her purse in our cabinetry allloose pills. ?Confused please help. He did, yet he got everything he wanted. My husband left me on 10-14-15, after 2years of being married says he found the person he had been looking for since he been in Florida, what I dont understand is why marry someone if you were looking for someone else??? I thought the point of counseling was to speak your mind. I believe in you, life is what we make it. How to cope: This is a great opportunity and time to ask yourself what you want to do with your time and how you want to live. A few weeks have now passed and Xmas has come and gone and no kids for me, nothing. Part of me wants him to come Home and tell me you made a big mistake. Why put everybody through all this again if you cant be bothered to truly try and put in effort. No one is perfect, but Its not you. Im a hopeless romantic at heart. Unlike bipolar or schizophrenia, a personality disorder is NOT a chemical imbalance! But some marriages can survive infidelity. Thank you for your response! I asked if there was someone else she said of course but right now I dont know what to believe please help thanks Derek, My situation isnt all that different man. I looked everywhere and i sat outside of the area for a long time. Just be prepared if you do this, you may see certain things that can really hurt you. I know he broke your heart and betrayed every single romantic connection you ever had together, but that doesnt mean he cant change. Its been over a year. This is not a mistake a mistake is backing your car into a bollard or something similar. My issue is that once she wants to leave (imminent), he dosent reciprocate and then she comes back what do I do? Yet she is cold. and there is hope. I thought everything was going well, we were hitting on better than ever, having more fun talking more, I felt confident things were going well as he told me they were. She nonchalantly says I am going to stay with my step 4 years ago my husband came home and announced he was thinking of divorce. But they are forced to be with her every other weekend. So we moved and then I noticed she one week she ceas carry we cell with her at all times, this was not like her she even slept with it . Im thinking of not paying the bills next month and moving out while shes away. But a committed couple can overcome any of these 5 reason and much more. I just wish I could hit fast forward. I feel abandoned by this country! I am unsure what to do. Friday comes and of course, she unplugs the house phone and turns off her cell and refuses to let me see my kids. Over the next 7 months she got a job (with her dad of course) and she kept going on about this guy friend at work. Oh my God. Im heartbroken and crushed and cant stop thinking about her. My situation Is different In that my ex is NICE all the time. We wanted to provide links to some resources that may be relevant to you here. absolutely the truth you cant endure such a tremendous heart ache without the love of Jesus and fully relying on his help to know Christ is the greatest gift on this earth in spite of all of our heartaches and trials and tribulations my husband left me in October of 2014 without of word took all of our money the car is everything personal belongings everything I came home to nothing and I dont care about the the world of goods my heart ached so terriblyworse than a death (my son died) pure disasterunable to withstand the pain in my heart although I was saved I guess I wasnt fully trusting the Lord at that moment I went outside of my secluded house in the middle of cornfields to hang myself and I took pills a lot (prescription) and I drank a bottle of whiskey in one drink I should have clearly died but did not! They are in love apparently and plan on living together and getting married down the road. Jeez, sounds like the 26 year itch. While it . Unfortunately these pieces need to meet the reader where he or she is, so there will definitely be different perspectives based on the context of each individuals situation. While cutting your hair may be regrettable, more harmful decisions may result in challenges down the road, such as substance misuse. Acting normal at home. They will never know how grateful I am. I was so in love and i realize it now that shes gone. I am caught between being committed to get through the bad stuff to get to the good stuff and being tired of all the conflict and chaos. Its easy to say move on when deep down inside you still have that love that you cant tear from the inside. Now my husband wants me back. First he started four days after our wedding to over communicate in the internet and made sure that I dont see what he does. Within a month she snaps the axel and damages the side of her car at a gas station pillar that protects the pumps. Any help and opinions would be gratefully appreciated. I am an amazing husband and I am taking it all wrong. Plus I have all these young children to look after :( my heart breaks. I am not trying to portray myself as a prince but I have given this woman my everything,My heart my soul my compassion, my trust my loyalty,My everything.And she just shattered everything to pieces.She takes a lot of meds for her mental and Physical problems,and she is going through Menopause. My prayers are for you but know that the pain will subside with time. Hi all, my husband has been feeling off this past year and thinks he has depression. Two blows in one go. If there is another woman hes talking to you probably want to know that sooner than later so dont be afraid to confront him on it. Shes married with two children as well, and was in a comfortable marriage. He doesnt pay his child support of 17 dollars a week, yet shows up at house with brand new shoes on his feet and new clothes on his body. Like said I get it, HIS fav team stuff all over drinking glasses and mugs. So Im on my own, hence the online searching for advice. There are many of us going through the same thing and you have a support network of people to reach out to for coffee, chats, friendships, even just to read stories and ask questions or know you are doing a great job. I am devastated we have 3 children and one doing his GCSEs I am a mess my daughter keeps questioning me and Im trying to hold it together but Im in so much pain and I cant imagine my life without him I found that he had taken my key out of my purse for the car. Individuals who lost 5 percent of their body weight over the course of four years were more likely to feel depressed . You don't feel understood. She will not put in any effort whatsoever and couldnt imagine being the same family we pretended to be all week on the weekend. I still love her and want to be with her for the rest of my life. Over the past year he has been leaving me in the dark about a lot of stuff. It doesnt take much, all it takes is a little time and effort to help you get through this hard time. Nothing is wrong with you! No matter what the true cause is, it is tied to your emotions. But, at the same time I have been for so many years, and still am, the focus of so much of her hate, scorn, and malice I really dont want live with that type of negativity one more day than I have to I am not a therapist. And part of me wants to move on and find somebody who truly appreciates and loves me for who I am. She speaks highly of him and is really attracted to him. (Her x comitted suicide when I met her). How can we say such things to each other, and then she goes away with him? She will not even contact my son, my god, what has he done wrong. One thing lead to another then we had sex. Now, your one and only is gone and you're left sitting wondering where everything went wrong and why he left. Last Thursday in anger I took his remaining clothes to his home only to find another woman there preparing him dinner. I come from a family of strong people. That is the latest science. He wants to be there for me, still my bes friend and has so much respect for me. One of the best things I heard directed at someone else- A christian man or woman shouldnt violate the conscience of their spouse, I hope some day I will be able to give myself fully to someone again, but it will be a while. His battlefield far out weighs ours! The same thing happened to me after an argument a few days prior, my husband said it was over. She has also began lying, eg i found out she was seeing a counsellor, she said they were actually friends, but I have seen she has been paying her fees on her bank statements. He said there was no one else and now he is back in his country parading around with someone else whom I have heard he plans to marry. Im sorry you misunderstood To this day I am sure she placed them there knowing I was coming. She told me she had more energy than everyone in her family and felt like she was waisting away. Jesus did not ever condone abusive behavior but he also didnt give you a right to judge your partner in a mental or physical illiness. I cry all the time. It caused me to have a heart attack, literally. Megan. But I will not allow someone to make an inaccurate statement about people with personal disorders. I hate being alone. Our marriage had had its problems but we were so strong we had overcome everything. Once you enter your information, youll be directed to a list of therapists and counselors who meet your criteria. I know how you feel. She will never understand just how much hurt she had made so many people feel so she could be selfish and live like a teenager ignoring the fact she has kids watching. So, when you believe your husband is having a midlife crisis, most wives find it very hard to do nothing. Both parties have kids. Im going through the same thing youre going through. The first time was right after I had our first child. The number one rule of Christianity is forgiveness. then he comes back home and is a great husband for another four months then next thing u know he leaves again . And I am 129 lbs 5-4, & socially bi resulting from his pillow talk request, so he has had many fantasies come true. Guilt that you divorced your mentally ill spouse. Are you close with his family? I am beyond hurt. On Saturday he told me in no uncertain that it was over and made me feel stupid for not knowing. Solicitors dont help you can go to them and tell them anything and they will help you. Its up to you whether you can see them through. Below are the top five reasons for leaving that I hear about while working with divorcing couples in my therapy practice. I later found out she moved into the house her male boss was selling. Also, start shopping for insurance now. Conversely, if your spouse works long hours out of necessity, this can signify that they're willing . He was my best friend, and had promised we could co-parent., My childs father was leaving me. They WOULD NOT like that at all. He has three kids I have two. When seen through anyone else's lens, she's beautiful. That there was my mistake in itself. I have spent hours on my knees crying out to God and he has been merciful. The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. Take care. Certain stresses have even been alleviated. Of course, feelings change over the course of a marriageyou are not going to have those sparks flying like you did when you first met. It will be awful and painful and confusing. Dont screw yourself. 1. My ex husband was in the house until the divorce papers dictated his date of departure . When your partner is depressed it may be very difficult to get clarity on this. My ex mistress got me arrested and the charges were dismissed by he stood by her as if I was wrong the judge agreed with me though I was telling the truth. Common I tried police, child services, court all backfired in my face and I lost them all together for 7 months I WILL NOT get anything like that involved again as I have absolutely no faith in it. Now, I see that dream, it just that, a dream. This one has been definitely the hardest for me to deal with. I knew it was something . There are all kinds of ways to tell if people are depressed. Trying to force him to love you again is a waste of time because thats not how love works. I remained strong on the outside and everyone asked how I kept it together, but that doesnt mean it wasnt extremely difficult and the most traumatic experience in my life. She chose some other dude. I havent overcome anything yet. My boyfriend of 24 yrs left me and our kids two months ago, we have two daughters that live with us one is 22yrs old and the other one is 23 yrs old and she is terminal ill who needs 24 hr care. The very best i could do is tip toe and stear her away from the many triggers for her depression and rage. My wife had insisted on getting a new house before we were ready. we were so in love and always affectionate when he was home.I am just also so devestated for my son he said he isnt gonna see him anymore he doesnt wanna drag it out but my he always loved my son so much and my son doesnt even remember life without him so he is very sad. Gender disparity in the rate of partner abandonment in patients with serious medical illness. My actually became a Judge in another County. When I have been upset and called to to him he has been very cold and mean.telling me he hated being in a relationship with hated being a family and so on. She isnt in love with me anymore. By not fighting, however, you may be able to begin your grieving process, and subsequent healing process, sooner. . Be we can do it. I told myself I was going to focus on my health, going to workout again & eat right. I have never felt so humiliated in all my life. it was no joke. Me finding pills over and over hidden in her car. I have fantastic close friends and an even better-extended family. Now he says its completely over but I dnt know if I can trust him. Because he worked full time he told me that from Monday to Friday he was unavailable and so I was alone doing it all . He saw a friend of mine recently and told her that he was upset by the split and still really loved me but he wont talk. And some families have one parent. Sometimes when a person leaves, they are unhappy not because they dont love you, but because they are hiding something. I am never able to maintain my anger for any length of time but never the less I am a poor former of words while angry so it is easy for me to see how I may have said something I didnt truly mean That really hurts. You dont have to be with them forever and ever, but they can help you through this time of your life. Once you get past the initial sadness, you will be able to take advantage of your life again. While he may have chosen to leave because he felt unhappy, unfulfilled, or whatever else, you mustn't start believing that you're somehow responsible for his choices. All of a sudden we move and after 32 years of marriage, recently he left with a girl who is my youngest daughters age her late 20s. Its just unreal. After all of this I still loved her and wanted things to work. I had told her that she needs help and that I was going to tell doctor about her abusing these pills. I hope she stays safe from this very dangerous man. Mental illness alone is no excuse to break up with someone. Your not the only one Focus on yourself and kids. I didnt understand it at all l would always tell him if you want to be with other people please jut let me know l do not wish to be a part of that. When I approached her she didnt deny it. Its just interesting that two years went by and he never once mentioned anything about being unhappy since the former conversation but felt justified to leave because he had a conversation two years prior to him leaving. We now have a new and our 5th counselor. If we move, he doesnt want to stay in the state but, the kind of small town where he would be happy generally has no work which in my view is not a win/win. Im surprised falling out of love is listed as one of the reasons. 2015 he wanted to return but i was afraid to living together so i left him out there. Right now you need to make the correct decisions for you and only you. Im trying to take it one day at s time but the anxiety is tough I keep ruminating and worrying about the future.i just keep telling myself for now its hard but Ive got to keep it together for my kids, Hi I never had empty nest for longer than 3 months and things were much better between my husband and I. How are you doing? Keep your mouth closed at all times. For many people, abusive behavior and infidelity are signs that a marriage is beyond repair. The problem isn't your job. I received my divorce and was devastated by my helpless circumstance. Paul thats interesting. I just want some kind of advice i feel like there is no reason to live anymore Fed up of the assumptions that there is another man involved ha! Your kids will love you more now than they ever have because they know youre doing your best to get through this emotional pain. I understand this. She is bipolar and has legal issues along with immigration issues. God wants HIS values to be lived out, more than our temporary satisfaction and happiness. Someone please help I feel like dying inside but I dont want to loose him I am in pain cant stop crying . I would cry all night just waiting for a hug. Always preoccupied doing something other than anything that would require real effort. You might want to file a complaint against her to freeze your money before you get that back. *they need to take some time for themselves Because i was not dressed for it and i am not comfortable with my body.